OK, so it's been a while since we've had a lynching around here. Things have been going along smoothly and quietly. So imagine my astonishment when I came around the corner the other morning and found this devastating sight:
No one knows for sure what their felony was, but whatever it was, they met with swift and deadly punishment. The executioner didn't even have the decency to dress them before their shameful demise.
For those who can't read the writing on the wall, it says, "Crime will Pay." And boy, did it.
Now I know what you're all thinking. "Which one of the evil brothers took those dear sweet Barbies away from their loving homes?" And, "Were their beloved benefactors moaning and wailing in grief as they watched the horrid show?"
Alas, these poor Barbies were the unfortunate recipients of the harshest of all treatment. They were given up by their own sweet female owner. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this is the worst of all deceptions. Sent to the gallows by their 7 year old "mother."
Don't let the sweet smile fool you. Underneath, apparently, is a murderous heart of deception. No one ever believed she could be capable of such a grisly deed. All this time, wearing the false garb of an innocent and thoughtful girl, all the while planning such atrocities in that macabre mind.
It's a dark day for Barbies, and poor Ken is donning his black arm band in memory of all of his well-endowed female friends.
And none of us will look at the 7 year old the same way ever again.